Building Resilient Dogs: The Power of Choice in Everyday Life

Imagine living your life with every decision made for you. What you do, what you wear, when you go out, which way you turn, when and what you eat. Everything. You won’t have much space to find out who you are, learn how to problem solve, how to deal with stress and you will have almost no chance to build resilience. That’s unfortunately how many of our dogs live. Every bit of their life is chosen for them. Not able to choose even the most mundane things that happen to, around or for them. Many experts believe that is one of the reasons why we have such a large amount of sensitive, reactive, nervous dogs. When everything is decided for them, they never get the chance to develop the resiliency a dog needs to live calmly and peacefully in this crazy world they find themselves in. Choice builds resilience by building personal autonomy, by giving our dogs a sense of control over their lives and building confidence. Not only that but it has been linked to common behavioral complaints like excessive attention seeking, frustration, mouthing and more.   

That isn’t to say that giving your dog choice will cure the behavioral problems you are seeing. There are many factors that go into our dog’s behavior. Genetics, history of learning, traumatic events, breed, the list goes on. Resilience will help balance those things though. It will help your dog recover from stress, help them make better decisions in the moment, help shrink their list of triggers or their threshold around those triggers. A resilient dog can handle new experiences, new places, new people that much more easily. A resilient dog is a more balanced dog. A dog who gets to make choices often, is a more fulfilled dog. 

Now if you are thinking, well I have an older dog, so they are already set in their ways, or I have a puppy and we have more important things to think about right now, I’ll say that adding more choice into your dog’s life is easy, effective and fun no matter what! There is no age that building confidence won’t be beneficial. No age where choice won’t boost a dog's quality of life. 

I’m sure some of you are thinking, ‘If I let my dog choose everything they do chaos will definitely ensue!’ Don’t worry. We are well aware that completely left to their own devices, our dogs will make some, let’s say questionable decisions. We aren’t suggesting that they should choose everything. That would lead to some pretty smelly, dirty and likely dangerous decisions! We are suggesting to find ways to build choices, even small ones into their everyday life. 

Here are some examples of small choices you can build into your dog’s everyday life:

• Allow them to choose the path. If you come to a fork in the road, allow your dog to choose which way you go. Better yet, let them take you off the beaten path by following their nose. Some of the most beautiful places I’ve been to in the woods have been as a result of a Sniffari! Of course, don’t let them lead you to a point that you might not be able to find your way back from, but let them follow those deer prints in the snow or the sound or a stream to splash in. You’d be surprised what wonders await you right off the trail!

• Let your dog choose their enrichment. Present them with 2 or 3 enrichment toys to have their dinner out of. Fill the one that they poke first with their nose, or spend the most time sniffing. Over time they will realize this choice affects them and what they will be doing that night so their preferences are able to be explored!

• Let them choose their activity.  Show them a tug toy, a fetch toy and a flirt pole. Whichever one they seem most interested in is the one you guys use together!

• To sniff or not to sniff? Whenever you have the time, let your dog decide how long they get to stay at a certain smell. Whether that’s stopping to enjoy the smell of the breeze or taking some extra time to sniff the P-mail. Let them have that time for as long as they want.

How about some bigger things we can let our dogs choose that will really affect their life?

• Let them choose who can touch them. Many dogs are expected to allow whoever wants to touch them to do so. Some dogs are very happy to oblige, many just put up with it because they have learned they don’t have a choice in the matter and others still actively avoid it in many ways. Allowing your dog the choice of who can touch them or even approach them will not only empower them but it will often lead to better interactions with humans and will definitely increase their trust in you and those around you!

•  Let them choose their safe space. This can be helpful in multiple situations. When dogs need a break from activity, when something worrying like a thunderstorm happens, when company gets a little too overwhelming. Letting your dog pick their safe space and keeping it sacred by supporting them and their needs goes a long way towards building their confidence thus building their resilience.

Which small step will you take today towards increasing your dog’s choices and building their resilience? Young or old, sensitive or bold, all dogs benefit from an increased ability to handle the world around them. If you do find yourself with a more sensitive dog then we invite you to explore our free resource made specifically for guardians of reactive dogs. Click here to learn more and to grab your copy for free today.